Myths and Facts

It could never happen to me.

Anybody can experience sexual violence. Although some people may be more vulnerable, sexual violence can impact anyone regardless of age, race, gender, social class, sexuality, (dis)ability, religion, occupation, and education level. Sexual violence can also be perpetrated by anyone. According to Stats Can, sexual assault is the only violent crime that is not declining.

Most sexual assaults are perpetrated by strangers.

The majority (80%) of sexual violence is perpetrated by someone the survivor knows such as a partner, parent, relative, friend, neighbour, co-worker, etc.

Some people are “asking for it” because of where they go, what they consume (drugs/alcohol), or what they wear.

Nobody asks to be sexually assaulted. All people have the right to choose what they are wearing, where they go and what they consume. Perpetrators are solely responsible for their actions. It is a conscious choice they make to harm another person. Sexual assault and rape are about exercising power and control over another person.

A partner cannot sexually assault their significant other.

Regardless of the relationship status, it is against the law for a person to force the other to engage in sexual activity. Being in a relationship with someone is not a replacement for obtaining consent and it is important to ask for consent at every step.

Women cannot perpetrate sexual violence.

Anyone can perpetrate sexual violence regardless of their sex and/or gender.

If a man was sexually assaulted by another man, this makes them gay.

1 in 6 men will experience sexual violence in their lifetime, experiences of sexual violence does not determine someone’s sexual orientation.

If I was sexually aroused (physiologically responsive) then I must’ve liked the assault.

The body will respond to stimuli regardless of if you have consented to the sexual act. Much like when people are tickled, they typically laugh- even if the tickling is not welcomed.

If you didn’t say “NO”, then you consented.

Only 45% of people in Canada fully understand what it means to give consent to sexual activity (Canadian Women’s Foundation, 2022). Consent comprises of 5 elements, often using the acronym FRIES:

F- Freely Given

R- Reversible

I- Informed

E- Enthusiastic

S- Specific

If a person doesn’t fight or try to run away from the attack, they cannot claim they were assaulted.

People faced with danger respond in different ways. A common trauma response to ensure survival is to freeze. This doesn’t minimize the attack or the trauma that can follow. The absence of physical injuries does not mean there was consent.

Survivors that cannot remember every detail are lying.

Trauma impacts a person’s memory of events in different ways. Traumatic memories are often fragmented, which means some details may stand out and others do not. Many survivors will try to minimize or even forget details of the assault to help them cope with the memory.

Women often falsely accuse men of sexual assault.

Only approximately 2% of reported rapes are false according to the FBI crime statistics.  This is the same rate of false reporting as other major crimes.

Most rapes are reported to police.

False.  In fact, only 5% of sexual assaults are reported to police. The main reason that survivors stated for not reporting was that they thought they would not be believed.

People with disabilities are less likely to be sexually assaulted.

This is false.  People with disabilities are victims of sexual assault twice as much as those without disabilities.